Diary extract from yesterday!
Today on world mental health day, I have laughed, cried and slept. A mixture of emotions has filled me today and to be honest exhausted me. Like lots of other sufferers I am overwelmed by the feel of dread or worry that occurs on a daily basis.
On days like this I hardly want to speak to anyone, I like to be in my own space and keep busy. This evening I have had tea, showered and looked through a magazine. These normal daily tasks help me to keep a little bit of routine, when all I really want is to sleep all day and not move from my bed.
So now I leave you with this final quote ‘you’re not going to master the rest of your life in one day, just relax’. 😊
Diary entry: 10th October
Today is world mental health day, ironic when this has turned out to be terrible for me. For the past week I have been feeling anxious when attending placement at the Hospital, I have been feeling like i’m not part of the team, like i’m not supported and drained from the long shifts. I arrived on the car park this morning and burst into tears. I just couldn’t face it today.. but instead of going home to bed I have come into University to address the issues I have which will be resolved. I have decided that I need to be working in another environment, one which inspires my confidence in nursing. Hopefully I will get the decision I wish for and be able to move. If not i’m not entirely sure what my next step is going to be, as I have again reached breaking point even though I am aware that there are always answers.
So on this day of mental health awareness, I leave you with this one thought. ‘Don’t fake being ok, you only hurt yourself, be real with what you are going through and don’t let it consume you’. 😊
I absolutely love anything that is glittery! Phone cases, shoes, bags etc. So I hate to say it but christmas will not be far away and this year I am going make it easy for myself.
I have already purchased some beautiful glasses which I will give as presents with a nice bottle of alcohol. These gifts look wonderful and I intend to buy more.
So this christmas I dare you to sparkle.. but if not add a little bit of glitter 😉
These glasses look fantastic!! #ideal gifts
Not a look I would try but does look very effective 😉
Another tip for a positive life!
I purchased this book a while ago, I love to read the quotes each day for a positive outlook. Katie Piper is an inspiration, and this book will help increase your happiness day by day #Littlethingsinlife
Today I have decided to blog as much as possible for two reasons.
- To set myself a challenge
- To spread awareness of anxiety.
I will blog all day, I intend to refresh and remind people what I blog about, spread awareness of anxiety, have a laugh and maybe throw a few beauty tips in too! I will post pictures and give ideas to help distract people from anxiety, panic and worry.
Now take a look at this old photo. Here I am young with not a care in the world listening to my music!! First tip of the day is to dig out old pictures! You could spend hours looking through pictures and smiling at the memories, this will distract you from anxiety and encourage you to embrace all the good times 😊
Another tip taken from the photo, listen to music 🎵 I have clearly loved listening to music from a young age. Music can help distract you from everything for a while. I occasionally put my headphones in while pottering around in the house. Music can help you reflect and gives you time out to think! Start by downloading an uplifting playlist heres a few tunes from mine.
- Amazed- Lonestar
- My girl-Temptations
- Mirrors- Justin Timberlake
- A sky full of stars- Coldplay
Now get your photos out pop your headphones in and have a wonderful day 🎧🎵😊
In most pictures used on my blog I haven’t shown my face. Ive always lacked confidence, but I have decided to show the real me. My hair isn’t always great and my make up doesn’t reflect the look of a kardashian. But I am happy lately with who I am and how I look. My confidence is coming on slowly as i’m now surrounded by good people who lift me higher.
My initial lack of confidence came from being bullied at school, for being skinny or not having the latest clothes. That wasn’t helped by ex’s who tapped away at my confidence even more by pointing out some of my flaws.
Now I believe that I am free again, I accept compliments and walk away smiling, before I would have walked away shyly without saying a word. I am happy now I have shown my face and ‘faced my fears’.. by doing so.
For months I looked at having lip fillers… I researched various places and gathered prices. I have always had thin lips and wanted a fuller but natural look.
For my birthday a few weeks ago I decided that with the money I had got, I would have fillers. I decided to book a place by university. I had listened to people who werent keen on the idea, but for me it was the first step in building my confidence. Newly single and moving home on my birthday was enough, so I took the plunge.
I went to the clinic with my friend and her sister, I was given numbing cream to put on then waited for 10 minutes. I then had the fillers, four injections into my top lip and two in the bottom. It did feel slightly painful but I loved the finished look.
I was going out that evening and could only use vaseline, but something strange happened this particular evening… usually I would walk into a bar not make eye contact with anybody and cringe at the thought of people staring at me.. but this night I walked into a bar, smiled at people, made eye contact and generally felt great. My lips were sore, but I was ecstatic about my new found confidence. I have to admit my lips were bruised the next day and throbbing, I dealt with this by taking pain relief and using ice packs.
Overall I would like to say that I am pleased with my lips, I love red colours and browns at the moment (fitting in with autumn). And more importantly I love my new little bit of confidence 😘